I'm Ed Miliband

24 September 2011: "Ed Miliband: I'd be crackers not to worry about my image" - The Telegraph

I'm Ed Miliband.
My accession was pre-planned
by Amalgamated Generals,
my Band of Other Brothers,
who selected me in lieu
and said that I would have to do.
So I sent fraternal greetings
plus a spot of lentil stew.

I'm Ed Miliband.
Let's remand the bonus vultures
and the me-too, yah-boo culture.
That's my something to declare.
Is anyone still there?

I'm Ed Miliband.
I demand a grand enquiry
that's judicial and in public,
and extremely sacrificial.
I demand a grand enquiry
so the badness is official.

I'm Ed Miliband.
I'm Ed Miliband.
You might say that I'm hypnotic,
but I'm not at all robotic,
but I'm not at all robotic.

I'm Ed Miliband.
I'm the man to take the stand,
to be the seeker after truth.
Isn't the truth, Mr Speaker,
that I should call for an enquiry
into whether I've persisted
past the date of my expiry?

I'm Ed Miliband.
I'm still in my hinterland.
I am experimental.
I am developmental.
I am non-governmental.

I'm a man who should rebrand.
I'm Ed Miliband.

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