FRANKLY

29 April 2010: Third leaders' debate in UK election.
Poem broadcast on 2 May 2010 on The World Today on BBC World Service.

Frankly, David
it's the same old story,
the same old Tories.

Frankly Gordon,
you make me angry,
you should be ashamed,
get real,
it's time for a change,
real change,
climate change,
any change,
and by the way,
the other day,
I went to Crosby
or was it Burnley,
and a man said to me,
I did the right thing,
I followed the rules,
now look what they've done
I'm not having fun.
And I said to him
in this country
we should make things.
And if you make me
your prime minister,
there'll be a cap
but we'll narrow the gap
and by the way
both of my children
go to state schools.

Frankly, Adina,
you are of course right.
Where are you, Adina?
You're out of my sight.
Oh there she is.
How do you do?
My name is Nick
and by the way
two of my children
go to state schools.
Now we politicians
have all let you down,
especially David Cameron,
especially Gordon Brown.
Adina, Adina
we should have come cleaner.
Now let's all get together,
with the Chancellor
of the Exchequer,
you and me,
and all of the people
living in shadows.
We'll find this black hole
and we'll fill it with fairness,
and Trident
and frigates.

Frankly, Nick
I think you're being
a bit holier than thou
but we'll do the right thing.
And we'll also throw in
at least six billion
paper clips.
We'll count them in,
we'll count them out,
there'll be exit controls.

Frankly, David
Frankly, Nick
you're both a risk,
you're a double dip.
They should never ever
have put me with you.
Get me Sue.
Now, if it's style
or if it's smiles,
please count me out.
But if it's about
the big decisions.
I am your man.
I am fighting
for wind turbines.
I go on trains
and not on planes.
I am a man
with a deficit
reduction plan.
You can count on me.
What you see
is what you get
and so I stand before you
and I say to David
and I say to Nick
and I say to the audience
and I say to the nation:
agree with me

or else you're all bigots.


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